Homeschooling Part 5:Socializing I

 Socializing and home schooling have for long been a top concern of many, or really the lack there of. I feel that when homeschooling is done correctly in a very loving and consistent environment the children will develop and flourish socially. Looking at what socialization is, how it is acquired and the importance of socialization or being socialized. I feel I can put the many concerns to rest.

   Let's first show the difference between socializing and socialization. Socialization is defined as 1. a continuing process whereby an individual acquires a personal identity and learns the norms,values,behavior, and social skills appropriate to his or her social position. 2. the act or process of making socialistic: the socialization of industry.
Socializing is defined as 1. to make social; make fit for life in companionship with others.2. to make socialistic; establish or regulate according to the theories of socialism.

 Glen H. Elder Jr. a Research professor of sociology and psychology at the University of North Carolina wrote an amazing article on Peer Socialization in Schools, He wrote I quote,

         "There are three time emphasis in the socialization of children: (a) on the past- molding the young in the image of the older generation by transmitting the cultural heritage and by reinforcing traditional behavior; (b) on the present- orienting the child towards the standards of membership and role performance in his current groups such as the family, age group, and the classroom: and (c) on the future preparing the child on the anticipated requirements of future roles, groups and transitions.

While, I recommend reading this, I doubt this is the socialization many are talking about when they express their concern of our choosing to home school. However, I would like to address the above cited points of emphasis on socialization and how it directly relates to our personal decision and implementation of home schooling.

(a) on the past- by being with my children every day and having control over what is learned or not. I can transmit not only our personal cultural heritages, but enforce positive traditional behavior, along with trying to eliminate unwanted traditional behavior. I say trying because I know the child has free will. For a very basic example; I will enforce holding the doors open for women. I will try to eliminate referring to women as chicks, hotties and so forth. Both above stated social norms have been more popular at different times.

(b) on the present- One way of orienting a child towards the standards of membership is allowing them to participate in group activities, not limited to the classroom; Such as Cub Scouts,and team sports.

(c) on the future- Not only will my kids be learning state required subjects, but as they get older I will personally require life skills budgeting, coupons, balancing a check book, changing a tire, changing the oil in a car, proper manners and etiquette of introducing oneself, good interviewing skills, plus many more things that will hopefully prepare my children for the future.

  Understand that purely being involved in society, and watching behavior modeled by myself and others, my children will learn all appropriate social skills.
  Bringing my second point what is socially appropriate social skills?